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insomnia i woke up and wondered just who made the bed i was lying in i know it wasn't me i never lift a finger i woke up and tried hard as no effort could to find the reason find the energy to crawl out of the bed i didn't make and i returned to every night the way i was so brave in the theories i never even tested and who made the bed the evil powers the higher ups the know better thans i was given no tools i could not build or rebuild only smooth the sheets and cover up i had no taste for that i left it all undone and when i woke up i did it every day the arguing and circle running mind marathons in search of something that didn't get a name or even a bed in which to rest that ran in circles too and not the ones i ran in and i got no rest in that bed made for me by someone else whose shape did not match mine whose form was no near fit i tore it down bare hands and yells forced breath and new found brave strong hands found a steady place of rest abandoned their conventions sleep in any place i stop only my body only my heart only my spirit only my hands set free by a mind that now understands i need nothing of what they built for me my body is all i need to breathe my mind is all i need to survive my heart is all i need to reconcile so i can finally get some fucking rest olivia bitting 1998 |